Growing up there wasn’t much my father and I didn’t argue about. Everything from the shape my bedroom was in to my prolific appetite was up for discussion. Many a family dinner fell victim to my desire to get in the last word about some controversy that didn’t exist an hour before. “Just shut up and let it go…,” my unfortunate younger brother, John frequently intervened, hoping for the basic human right of eating my mom’s fantastic meatloaf in peace.
A classic was when my dad, in a rare moment of frugality decided my brothers and I were drinking too much milk, and rationed us to two glasses per dinner. Well, my acute sense of injustice alerted, I was not about to suffer limits on God’s bounty, even if they were imposed by the guy who paid the bills! I finished my second glass before even starting on the mashed potatoes, and all eyes were upon me, including those of my oppressor, daring me to step over the line in the sand. As I stood to head toward the kitchen, prepared to instigate a domestic dispute that would surely rock Farnsworth Drive, an epiphany took hold and forced clarity on my narcissism… I was acting like a jerk! I don’t pay a cent for anything! Who am I to feel so privileged I can demand as much as I please?! I sat back down, my mom exhaled in relief. I looked at my dad and in my most supplicanted tone offered “can I have more milk if I do some extra chores?” To which the man who created me, who bore my constant need to push the envelope of his reasonable disciplinary edicts, who sheparded me through life, despite my near constant efforts to make things tougher…. that saint of a man looked down over his worn glasses and answered simply: “What are you talking about?! You don’t do anything around here to begin with!”
So much for memory lane and the wonderful diplomacy seeped within the Carey lineage. The point is finding things to argue about is as easy as picking losers at the racetrack; it is innate and never far from view. That it took so long for television and radio executives to discover the road to profits “debate” represented is a great mystery that surely spared us much societal trauma, and perhaps enabled our Post-War society to evolve free of the moronic populism we now suffer.
Yet and still, there is nobility in disagreement. I doubt anybody ever described democracy as the protector of freedom because it allows everybody to agree with each other. Rather, it provides for peaceful and constructive disagreement. We can discuss things instead of fighting about them. We can finish dinner together after a political discussion and take things into the den over dessert… rather than the front lawn over bloody knuckles. Er, well… you get my drift.
That we are going to disagree is a given; the substance, or more importantly lack of it, of what we are currently at odds about seems most relevant as our polarization continues apace. That Trump’s wretched core, of course heartened by Fox/AM, now equates any and all disgust with his daily hit parade of gratuitous outrages as “liberal hatred” clarifies both points. We are now actually arguing about behavior that until two and a half years ago it was assumed wouldn’t be tolerated for a minute in a POTUS, and it does not appear possible to carry on such “conversations” in a civil manner.
Trump true believers, most of whom were generous with their anger toward all manner of Obama provocation, from the tan suit to the awkward salute to having the unmitigated gall of empathizing with black fathers of unarmed sons slain by vigilantes, now enjoy being the ones calm and in control, wondering aloud why there is so much vitriol over things that don’t matter. Afterall, it’s just a tweet! Sure, he could act more presidential, but it’s policy that counts.
Do they have a point? Nothing Trump does surprises anymore, and he’s sure not going to change… why keep obsessing about it? I have a neighbor with a Facebook page from hell, all in on everything Trump and GOP. It operates on two levels: one, gaslight Trump’s peccadillos as trivial in the scheme of things; two, highlight all form of left wing excesses as the reasonable mirror to Trump’s conduct. Trump may have tweeted his uncle was a scientist so, naturally, Climate Change is a hoax, but look at this Yale freshman screaming how ashamed she is to be white! Apples to Apples.
Meanwhile, almost $2 trillion was gift wrapped to upper income brackets at full employment, and the EPA doesn’t think scrubbers are necessary anymore for coal-fired power plants. The military budget is now well over $700 billion and lame duck legislatures in Wisconsin and Michigan seek to hobble the mandate voters clearly put forth. Maybe we are allowing Trump’s hourly inanity to dim the forest for the trees. Trump fatigue is real and it’s diluting the essential points to be made on the substantive debates that matter. Playing right into nihilist hands. Right? … Wrong!
With apologies to my wife – who begs me to, get ready, “shut up and let it go!” – acclimating to constant lies and disgraceful behavior is not an option if we want to remain a going democratic concern. The whys of how we got here are not as important as the whats we now endure. And while policy is of course important, even critical, process is the ball game; and our machinery simply won’t survive if hourly lies and personal attacks in defense of corruption become par for the course.
Trump, after months of outright lies, which his defenders accepted and amplified, now accepts as true he oversaw hush money payoffs to women he slept with. The strategy now is to shrug and say big deal, none of it rises to anything more than a civil issue, fully comparable to Obama campaign shenanigans which were simply assigned a fine by the FEC. The magnitude of such deceit is clear when one dwells for even a moment on any comparable scenario involving Obama and payments to women, and imagines the GOP response.
With Mueller still keeping most of his cards to his vest, this is only the beginning, just one salvo of breathtaking dishonesty and hypocrisy Trump and the GOP are comfortable presenting those who elected them. There is a reason we can’t get past the nonsense…. it’s damn dangerous nonsense. How do you chat casually about such an overt liar as Trump? I’m all ears.
Mark Twain once pointed out the person who tells the truth doesn’t have to remember anything. Our President is seldom honest and has a terrible memory; that’s a very bad combination. More than 75 percent of Republicans still support Donald Trump, many with the caveat that the policy ends he pursues justify looking past the ugly means by which he pursues them. Such illogic may end up destroying the GOP in the wake of their champion’s implosion, which seems more likely by the week. Regardless, what they are willing to abide is their problem, and of their own making. The rest of us need to keep the faith and appreciate what counts, working toward restoring at least the expectation of government by responsible people, where lies and abasement are career enders. That means never getting anything more than unbearably uncomfortable with the current occupant’s unprecedented demeanor, and making clear it is indeed intolerable. It’s a fight worth ruining dinner over. BC